We all think our children are perfect when they’re born. And they are. It doesn’t matter if they’re born with Down Syndrome, club feet, cleft palate, none of that matters. To us they are perfect. We try to teach them that no matter what their handicaps are, they can still achieve success. Then we send them to school.

There they are taught how to read, write, do math and interact with others. Some children, however, don’t learn basic social skills. They are taught that they have to be better than others at any cost. Our kids start learning at home. What they see and hear at home forms how they will interact with others.

For example, if one parent tells the other parent not to make the child do something because they don’t want to, that is setting the child up to believe they don’t have to do anything for themselves later in life. It teaches that child that someone else will always be around to do for them. We all know that’s not the case.

If a child sees one parent making another parent miserable, they start learning that it’s OK for them to make their spouse or significant other miserable. If a child hears their parents belittle each other then they learn it’s OK to belittle others. Everything we do, our children learn from. They mimic everything we do.

As toddlers it’s hilarious. But as they grow they continue to mimic the dominant parent. Bullying starts at home, just like everything else. The bullying is spread into schools, workplaces, and future marriages. We build our children up to succeed, bullies try to tear them down to fail.

Here are some signs that your child maybe bullied, a fear of going to school, a severe drop in grades, depression (which can manifest in sleeping too much, eating too much, withdrawing from family and friends, spending too much time alone, etc).

The long term effects can be multiple failed jobs, multiple failed relationships or marriages, severe social anxiety, panic attacks for no reason, weight gain, weight loss, severe depression, lack of esteem, failure to thrive, and the list goes on.

For anyone who is reading this, if you’re being bullied at school, home or work tell someone. If you’re bullied at home call your local Child Protection Agency. If you’re being bullied at school tell your guidance counselor, that’s what they’re there for. If you’re being bullied at work tell your supervisor, if it’s your supervisor doing the bullying go to the Human Resources Dept. It’s their job to stop or address

these types of problems.

Please seek help of any kind. You’re too precious for us to lose.